The Secret 'Honey-do' Recipe

It doesn’t pay to think in our house – or maybe it costs too much.  HE says I’m dangerous when I think, I say I need to keep the old wheels turning.  HE says when I think, one of two things happens – either it costs him money or it means more work for him.

             Well, didn’t he read the fine print on the 'for better or for worse’ contract?  It’s my job to create the ideas and it’s his job to follow through.  Just like it’s his job to cut the wood and mine to burn it.  Didn’t he learn anything in 37 years of marriage?  Doesn’t he know that’s where the saying came from ‘Opposites attract’?  Makes sense to me.

             One has to earn the money and one has to spend it.  And I’m very good at spending it – I’ve been working hard at honing my buying skills for many years now.  You know a new dress here, a new pair of slacks there.  You just hang them in the closet long enough to catch a little dust and then you can truthfully say “I’ve had these things for ages…” It helps if you have a wood burning stove in your home – having one causes the dust to gather a million times faster.

             But what started this ‘broken record’ conversation was just a relaxing moment sitting on the outdoor chairs enjoying one of the few warm moments we’ve had so far this season.  I had spent considerable time over the winter planning changes to my flower gardens.  And now that planting season is approaching, I thought it was time to share my thoughts with ‘him that must do the digging…’.

             He wasn’t overly thrilled when I told him of my dream for a new flowerbed in the center of the front lawn.  His immediate question was “Who are you going to get to dig it for you?”  As if!  I didn’t practice that “You’re such a sweetheart” smile all these years for nothing.

             After batting my eyelashes and flashing that knowing smile, I thought it an appropriate time to casually add  “Did I tell you about the fence that needs to go up between the front corner of the garage and the back corner of the house?  I’m sure I mentioned it before!”   And, while the ball was still rolling I thought I might as well go for broke.

             “Honey do, once that fence is up there are just two tiny, tiny flower beds that need to be dug up on the inside of the fence.  But, after that’s done I can take it from there.”   I really didn’t want to overdo it.  Besides I can wait until the next ideal moment to add a few other honey do’s.

             Now is not the time to tell him about the collection of birdhouses that must go on the side of the garage or the two sections of fencing to be erected in the yard to provide just the right backdrop for the old pot bellied stove (he’s going to LOVE moving that heavy thing across the yard….) and a few more surprises that are still up my sleeve.

             I really have learned after all these years not to pack the job jar too full – otherwise it just collects dust like my new slacks and dress!  Best to ease into the jobs that must be done – plant the seed, let it germinate a bit and then put on my supervisor’s hat!   Must say, I wear it well.

             HE thinks I need to disappear whenever a job needs to be done – rather than stick around.  Something to do with his priority list being the total opposite of mine.  I say every job needs a supervisor and while I don’t actually tell him how to dig dirt, I might very politely suggest where he should dig it – after all they are going to be my flowerbeds.

             But being the kindhearted soul he is, I have no doubts I’ll get my fence and my flower beds and when we are relaxing in those same chairs, surrounded by a beautiful array of flowers in all the colors of a rainbow, sipping a cool lemonade, I’ll be sure to acknowledge his wonderful efforts to keeping wifey happy –“Look at your garden dear, you did a magnificent job.   I was just thinking…”